You want your man back, yes, but you also want to have him back in the context of a loving, long-lasting relationship. If you can’t have him in that capacity, then really, what’s the point of it all? This article will outline for you the four essential ingredients of any successful relationship. If your relationship has these four things, then you maximize your chances for success in the long term. We call them LIST:
A relationship without love and understanding is no relationship at all. If you don’t have this kind of connection with your partner, then you’ve got to seriously reevaluate why you’re in the relationship to begin with. This is the building block upon which any romantic relationship rests. Yes, chemistry and attraction are important, but if you think about it, they’re precursors to true love, understanding and acceptance of each other.
Part of what bonds us to each other in a relationship is intimacy. Most people mean sex here, of course, and sex is a big part of it, but intimacy in a relationship can (and should) take many different forms. You absolutely need to feel comfortable just being close to each other. In terms of your relationship with your ex, you should think about this closely. How was the sex between the two of you? What other forms of intimacy did you enjoy, or were there any?
From earliest times, people have formed relationships for reasons of security. Physical and emotional safety. Things are no different these days, although most people don’t consciously think about forming relationships for these reasons. Nonetheless, if you don’t feel safe, stable, secure and comfortable in your relationship with your chosen man, then you’ll always be uneasy.
Just as intimacy is an important part of any relationship, you’ve also got to be able to just be in the same room with each other without sex. A relationship that’s based on sex alone won’t last very long. Sure, the two of you can, and probably will have a lot of fun together, but there’s a lot more to a relationship than just that.
The two of you have to be able to enjoy doing things together. Spending “quality time” together at activities that don’t have anything to do with sex. Your husband/boyfriend should be more than just a convenience, he should be someone you genuinely enjoy doing even the most mundane things with.
We mention these things because if you’ve recently had a relationship end, you may be inclined to try and win your man back. If you are, then the first thing you’ve got to do is ask yourself if your ex gave you those four things when you were in a relationship with him.
If not, then you need to do some serious reflecting on exactly why you want to get back together with this person. On the other hand, if all four of those were present in your former relationship, and it was something else that broke the two of you up, then there’s at least a chance of long term success if and when you get back together.
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